Wear it Purple Day has a special meaning for me as a proud gay man and a teacher. This August I am once again reflecting on the importance of this day and visibility.
I never thought I would become a teacher and my first experiences in the industry were not particularly positive.
Early in my career, I taught at a school where homosexuality was not accepted – so much so that I was fired from my job when my sexuality became public knowledge. After that, it took me a long time to feel ready to return to the classroom.
Ten years later, I started to feel confident enough to experiment with my self-expression as a gay man. My usual brown hair was gone and I switched between countless different bright colors depending on my mood.
I eventually settled on pink hair, which I styled into a striking mohawk. It became my chosen form of self-expression, a way to express my pride. Pink hair is of course not exclusively synonymous with queerness, but for me it became a symbol.
This is what I looked like when I re-entered the world of teaching. Although my confidence in my queer self-expression had grown over the past decade, I was understandably apprehensive about returning to the industry with flamingo-colored locks. But my confidence won out and I thought, “Whatever, I’ll give it a go.”
I started as a substitute teacher. In the elementary schools where I worked, the children loved my hair and called me “Mr. Unicorn‘.
Eventually I ended up at my current school, working with senior students. My headteacher was a little concerned at first – dyed hair just wasn’t common there – but then she realized how important my hair was to me. She accepted me for who I am, and I became the full-fledged rainbow teacher I am today.
My school is a wonderful place to work and it has been a great opportunity for me to witness the positive impact of queer teacher visibility.
During college, LGBTQI+ teachers are explicitly told to hide any sexuality or gender identity that falls outside heteronormative notions; to hide everything, to not exist. But the pressure to hide my existence at work was exhausting me – I felt like every sideways glance was speculation or accusation.
Now there are no secrets to hide. I feel free to be myself. Ten years after my first teaching experience, I walked into the classroom again with my pink hair – it turns out that’s my superpower.
Recently a conversation took place that I will never forget.
While enjoying a drink at my local hotel, a young man in his twenties approached me. He told me that he had gone to another school in the area.
“I just wanted to thank you,” he said.
“As a gay man, I had a terrible time at school. My school didn’t accept me, the other students were really horrible to me,” he said with tears in his eyes.
“But seeing you out there in the community made a difference.”
“Seeing you with your pink hair and your husband and your son and seeing you exist and be here and be happy was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.”
“You saved my life. I knew I wasn’t alone and I knew there were people like you out there and that was reason enough for me to keep going.”
It is moments like these that Wear it Purple Day so significant.
It shows that we need to continue to be visible to young LGBTQI+ people. Because when our young people see us living our authentic selves, they know it’s OK – and one day they will be able to too.
Simply by being visible, we empower our young people in more ways than we realize.
