Alexander Marks, a lawyer who works in public education and lives in Las Vegas, was baffled when potential dates on dating apps messaged him at least a dozen times over the past few years asking about his credit score.
“It’s a strange approach because you’re just reducing me to a number,” said Marks, 38. “That’s an instant turn-off for me.”
The small three-digit numbers are created when credit bureaus collect information about your payment and debt history from lenders. Credit scoring companies then use this to assign you a numerical score between about 300 and 850.
Banks use the scores to decide who will receive a loan.
Those looking for love say they’re not bad at looking for romantic partners either – well, except when they do.
Dan Fiscus, 25, said he often chatted with women about his credit score when he was single and on apps. Sometimes the women brought it up, sometimes he did.
For Fiscus, who works in information technology in Washington, D.C., it seemed normal. In college, it was common for people to ask each other how they paid their tuition or how much debt they had. He and his girlfriend, Victoria Gendron, talked about finances early in their relationship. Both have credit scores in the mid-700s.
“I feel like this conversation has brought us closer together,” says 23-year-old Gendron, who wants to become a nurse.
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Many critics take issue with credit scores, questioning whether they are fair or even if they work at all. The formulas tend to exclude people who are new to the U.S. or who have worked with cash their entire lives. The factors that affect a person’s credit score up or down seem to be a black box.
And those Romeos who think a high credit score automatically means their date is rich should think again. Credit scores are meant to measure a person’s ability to repay a loan, not how much money they have. Research from the Federal Reserve has found only a moderate correlation between income and credit scores.
A survey by financial services company Credit Karma found that two-thirds of Americans think it’s important that their partner has good credit. Half of those who have used a dating app or are willing to use one wish the apps could filter by financial status, according to the survey of about 1,000 people.
Another personal finance company, Neon Money Club, temporarily launched a dating app this year for people with a credit score of 675 or higher. The company said the app, Score, attracted about 18,000 users in its six months of existence.
When Katherine Lemus heard about Score, she told her single friends to try it out.
“People say, ‘You’re greedy,’ but that’s not the point: It’s about knowing you’re not going to support someone,” Lemus said.
In her 20s, Lemus signed a credit card for her then-partner who had bad credit. When the relationship ended, she was left with past-due bills. Her credit score dropped to 500 points, she said.
“When you make that one little mistake, things just get worse,” said Lemus, who is now married and lives in Toronto.
Still, scores don’t always work as a dating tool. Yuri Selukoff listed his credit score on his profile after reading about an influencer who got multiple dates after the same behavior. Selukoff, an app developer from San Francisco, has an excellent score of over 800.
In the subsequent message chats, no one mentioned it.
“It was just before I got disillusioned with this whole idea of dating apps and stopped using them altogether,” said Selukoff, 50. If he ever decides to return to the dating scene, he hopes to meet new people through his side job as a drummer in a rock band.
People with good credit scores have an easier time getting a mortgage or car loan and benefit from a lower interest rate – which could be attractive to a potential partner.
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But Dylan Selterman, a social psychologist at Johns Hopkins University, said credit scores are not a reliable indicator of whether two people will enter into a romance, unlike characteristics such as values, morals or attachment style.
“However, financial resources and the ability to have a stable life together are very important things in the logistics of a relationship,” he said. “It’s hard to have a relationship when you’re struggling to make ends meet.”
Sociologist Michael Rosenfeld of Stanford University, who studies mating and dating issues, says credit scores can serve as an indicator of other forms of trustworthiness because they take into account whether a person has repaid their previous loans.
“Long-term relationships come with risks,” Rosenfeld said. “You want to know if the person in question pays their bills or has a tendency to shirk their responsibilities.”
A 2019 Pew Research Center survey asked people about their reasons for getting married. The most common answers were love and companionship. Nearly 40% of respondents who were already living with a partner said finances were also an important reason. Only 14% said they wanted to have children.
On dating app OkCupid, daters who stick to a budget get 25% more matches and have 16% more conversations on the app than those who don’t, the company said. In 2022, OkCupid found that a third of daters said it was important that their match had a good credit score.
However, some people find it distasteful to ask about creditworthiness before a relationship has even begun.
On a first date at a Starbucks in Rock Hill, SC, Patterson mentioned to Kannon that he works as an accountant.
“I bet you have really good credit,” was his date’s response.
The 25-year-old’s weight is over 700. He is also now with someone else.
Write to Harriet Torry at [email protected]
