It would be reasonable to assume that you could turn to your family for any problems that arise. After all, they have known you for most of your life and your well-being is surely their top priority.
However, Tore Kesicki (@mindbodynetwork), an NLP master practitioner from the USA, explains on TikTok why we should think twice before confiding in our loved ones.
Kesicki, who calls himself an “entrepreneur coach,” warns against falling into the trap of thinking that family members need to know everything about your life—especially when it comes to these four specific things.
If you love someone, you probably argue with them. (Getty Stock Images)
Marital problems
First, Kesicki recommends not confiding in your partner about any marital or relationship problems you’re having—doing so could cause tension between the people you care about.
“Number one: marital problems,” he says. “Family members sometimes forgive you, but they never forgive themselves.”
Family secrets
Gossip and sharing of confidential information – even within the family – can cause big problems, he claims.
Kesicki says to “hold on to them as if they were your own,” adding, “That only causes problems.”
Therapy sessions
The life coach warns to be careful what you share. (Getty Stock Images)
While there should never be a stigma around being open about your mental health, Kesicki warns that the wrong people could use it against you if they wanted to — in an argument, for example.
“Families tend to like to use this crap against you, especially when they’re mad,” the life coach said.
Life goals
Now this is one thing that might be confusing as you will certainly want to share your plans for the future with your family, however this could backfire depending on your plans or if you come into a large amount of money, such as by winning the lottery.
“And fourth, don’t reveal your income or your life goals,” Kesicki said.
“There are haters all over the world, and believe me when I tell you, there are haters in your family too.”
And in the comments, many seemed to share Kesicki’s opinion.
One person agreed: “Yup. I learned my lesson with my own mother. I love her but she’s a gossip.”
“She shared a very personal secret with some family members and that devastated me.”
A second wrote: “I don’t tell anyone about this. I learned that many, many years ago. I wear my poker face every day.”
A third added: “My relatives always wanted to see my downfall, but I’m still standing – because disappointing them would be far too easy!”
Others said that this shouldn’t be a problem if you are surrounded by people who really support you.
If anything, sharing could be a strength.
“Families mean relatives. When you have a healthy family, you can share,” insisted a fourth, while someone else said: “I share money with my family. We are one unit and there is enough for everyone.”
