Summer is flying by and we’re already halfway through August! Even though we still have some time until the end of the month, Twitter has already been full of great jokes. So here are some of the best tweets of the month so far:
And follow the accounts that made you laugh to make your Twitter timeline even better!
1.
oh you like NYC? Name every rat
β Erica (@ericanextdooor) 5 August 2024
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(throws her away harshly): yes, that’s right. We are in cahoots
β bort (@tacobort) 6 August 2024
5.
I had a roast summer in 2022 and spent two years recovering from this type of behavior
β tim (@deliclit) 6 August 2024
6.
Being 24 is fun because you make friends who you have no idea are 32
β Danaka says: Free Palestine π΅πΈ (@wifeoftoast) 6 August 2024
7.
Mom, can you pick me up? I took a consulting job and am now with Top Golf Cincinnati.
β maxim (@maxim_516) 7 August 2024
8.
(first day as a pilot) the What Pit
β Charlie James (@malecowgirl) 8 August 2024
9.
Dating app for people without dicks called Fumble
β Tweet from Davidson π (@andykreed) 8 August 2024
10.
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @ANiMaListicAN
11.
when an ugly man follows you on IG, it feels like you are being followed in the woods
β conejita π (@plsmeowtome) 9 August 2024
12.
Flirting by saying βthank youβ instead of βthank youβ
β Michaels (@FilledwithPiss) 13 August 2024
13.
the dentist is going to ask me if I have a girlfriend…girl, do you see those bruises on my throat?
β AMIIR (@_amirnyc) 13 August 2024
14.
Disneys / Twitter: @hashjenni
15.
I really need to have sex, but I donβt want to
β aubrey (@aubviouslynot) 14 August 2024
16.
Does anyone know why he did this to me? Don’t worry if not
β ΩΨ§ ΨΩΩΩ (@Idgafwarvet) 15 August 2024
17.
My friend got shot so I brought him a crossword puzzle to the hospital. He said “thanks but does it look like I want to do a damn crossword puzzle?” Like oh okay damn I thought ππππππππ
β NOEL. (@ninaanoell) 1 August 2024
18.
PBS / Twitter: @awaitingtrial
19.
after I did my little peace sign/head tilt combo, take the camera out of my face, frππ
β IMANI (@prettygirll4L) 2 August 2024
20.
I’m a toilet freak and I hate to see myself cum π©π©π©π©π©π©π©π©π©π©
β PUNKINπ·οΈ (@fineasspunkin) 1 August 2024
21.
“born a man” “born a woman” Sir, I was born a child. A baby, even
β πΈπ€ πΉpallas π€πΈ (@amazonmilkfrog) 2 August 2024
22.
I know the block button hates to see me coming.
β SLIM (@_slimarella_) 2 August 2024
23.
Being 25 is crazy, I’m paying bills and fees I’ve never heard of
β TEEK (@yeahytk) 4 August 2024
24.
I still want to know why the Popeyes chicken sandwich made you act like that
β Party makes me wetterβ (@mainbitchclique) 7 August 2024
25.
Nickelodeon / Twitter: @hashjenni
26.
Disneys / Twitter: @Kamogelo_MN
27.
STX Entertainment / Twitter: @vveetto
28.
I just realized that paying with Apple Pay and Face ID is a bit like using a picture card
β by (@clairobeatty) 10 August 2024
29.
reserved reserved reserved do mure applications
β xavier (@nahimdifferent) 12 August 2024
30.
to jump around to promote character development and advance the plot
β Michael (@FilledwithUrine) 12 August 2024
31.
βYou dodged a bulletβ OK and maybe I wanted to be shot. Ever thought about that
β ΩΨ§ ΨΩΩΩ (@Idgafwarvet) 13 August 2024
32.
Pilates is fun, but you also wonder, who are all these women?
β em (@cbcradio2) 12 August 2024
33.
Cartoon Network / Twitter: @KaniRosi
34.
Harpo Productions / Twitter: @iceihy
35.
I did this new challenge called Doing Bad August, which is about doing badly in August
β little green (@btwnrevolutions) 9 August 2024
